I’m single and hope one day to get married. In the past, I was in no doubt that I wanted to marry someone who is Christian – for I’ve heard countless Christians say marrying an unbeliever is a bad thing to do. But now I’m thinking that I’d be okay with marrying an Atheist or an Agnostic – as long as they aren’t the angry, Richard Dawkin types. I would much rather be married to a kind, compassionate non-Christian than a self-righteous, obnoxious Christian. I recently read an article published by Relevant Magazine that was encouraging Christians to marry within their faith even pointed out that marry a Christian won’t guarantee a divorce-free marriage. Only a fool would say marrying a Christian means you’ll never get divorced. Divorce happens to all kind of couples no matter what they think of God and religion. I think to have a successful marriage depends on few things. In my view, Mark Manson’s article on marriage really shows how to have a good marriage. Mark isn’t a Christian yet his research and advice on marriage is superb. There’s this myth spread by some Christians that those who aren’t believers are nothing but selfish. They only get married for money and sex but reading such an article proves such a view is false. Sure there’s selfish non-believers as well as selfish Christians, I think at the end of the day it depends on what kind of person an individual wants to be. Ultimately a successful marriage happens if the right people marry at the right time for the right reasons.
I think it’s an ignorant position to have if we think someone who has no belief in God means automatically they have no morality. Yes, it’s possible that there may be some who may reject God’s existence so they can take part in debauchery, but surely no one can really think that it’s only Christians who have done good things in this world.
Let’s take the British politician Jo Cox for example. Jo was a rarity in politics because she cared more about making the world a better place than fighting against the opposition. Before becoming an MP she worked in the most dangerous war zones as the head policy and head of humanitarian campaigning for Oxfam. She lived very selflessly, serving others. But she wasn’t a Christian, she was a humanist
Sure there are Christians who have lived just as unselfishly as Mrs Cox, but no one should fool themselves into thinking that those who only have a faith live in such a way. Being a Christian doesn’t automatically mean you won’t be self-centred, nor does being a non-Christian mean you will only think about yourself. As a Christian at times I’ve been selfish and at times I haven’t. As wrote earlier, I think in the end to be selfish or not is a choice a person has to make.
Last month a tweet by Ayesha Curry seemed to get quite a number of people got worked up. In it, she said something about preferring to cover up in the way she dressed. She seemed to annoy some for not wanting to show her flesh and some were angry she didn’t cover up more. Some of the reactions by Christians involved a lot of stone throwing. A few saying she and her husband were bad Christians and that Mrs Curry was a bad example of modesty. This seems to be an ongoing occurrence – Christians getting hung up on the modesty issue when it’s only mentioned once in the Bible. It seems they’re certain individuals that seem to think there’s nothing more to a woman than her body. I’m not saying that there are not inappropriate ways of dressing in certain situations but sometimes Evangelicals can make the way of dressing a bigger issue than it should be. I remember as a teenager attending a talk (for young people) at a Christian camp. The person giving the talk touched on the subject of modesty, they were very dismissive of those who say that what’s in the heart is more important. The individual giving the talk said God looking at the heart was only mentioned once (in scripture), yet conveniently ignored the fact that modesty is only mentioned once as well. I also should mention that it’s wrong to say the heart is only mentioned once since Jesus constantly talks about the heart.
I think Christians reaction to Ayesha Curry really highlights how good Christians can be judging at other. It doesn’t stop and end at how women dress. It’s not enough to be someone who believes in Jesus, you have to dress the right way, talk the right way, do more, be better and try harder. It’s not enough to be a Christian, you need to read your Bible and pray every day. You need to fast, evangelise, watch the right movies and only listen to the acceptable music. If you don’t do these things you’re a very bad Christian, and those supposedly do such things will do their best to make you feel guilty. Thankfully not every Christian is like that but I find quite a number are. I mean really are you a moral person if you’re constantly judging people?
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